My hands are not rough— they have not met you. 

Lies and pretty eyes
they’d be the downfall
to my lonely frights. 

I have never been up this early

the world sure does look weaker.

mickeymichal:

Five year old Zeke ran up the stairs tears in his eyes, he was clutching his stomach when he stumbled into his sister’s room,

“Jo! I did something really bad!” He screamed.

Johanna, who was 13 years older than her little brother, turned around from her studies , “What did you do this time?” She sighed heavily. This wasn’t the first time Zeke ran upstairs from the basement crying. It was usually over something stupid like, ‘Jo! There’s a big spider please kill it!’ or ‘Jo! Can you fix my power-ranger’s arm? It fell off!’ and so on. It was a never-ending story with Zeke, always something else to fix.

He was turning red, still clutching onto his stomach, tears started to soak his Bob the Builder shirt, snot was running in every direction possible, “I swallowed a nickel!” He was choking on his tears.

First, Johanna couldn’t even believe he knew the difference between a nickel and a dime. He was only five for heaven sake, so she said, “Which one is the nickel?” Thinking it would calm him.

“Come on Jo it’s the medium sized one!” And then, “The thicker one!” Zeke sat on the floor with his hands on his head, rocking back and forth.

She started to panic. With her limited high-school-based-biology knowledge of the digestive system, everything first goes down the esophagus, then moves its way down the stomach. What if it’s not making its way down the stomach?

“Oh my GOSH Zeke! You fucking retard! Why did you do that?!”  She was out of her mind. She didn’t know what to do. No one was home, she should have watched him. She shouldn’t have let a five year old play in the basement alone.

He didn’t pick up on the swear and kept crying, “I know it was dumb! I’m sorry! Am I going to die?”

Then he said something that made her heart drop to her knees, “He made me do it!”

She picked him up, took the car keys to the Mazda her parents weren’t letting her drive, locked the house, and put him in the booster. Johanna wasn’t looking back to the house, she made her way to the nearest hospital. “Stop crying Zeke, it’s okay, who made you?” She started to freak out herself, “Who made you swallow the nickel?” She was calling her Dad to let him know what was happening, then asked Zeke again.

“Jerry made me. He made me put the nickel on my tongue and drink it down with water.”

Who the fuck was Jerry? An imaginary friend? Zeke never mentioned any imaginary friends.

“Is he pretend, Zeke?” She looked at the rearview mirror, noticed he stopped crying.

“No,” He said calmly, “Jerry is a man who lives in our basement. He said he has been there for a long time. I see him in the laundry room all the time.”

Yearn for trouble,
and trouble may seek.

Seek for trouble,
and trouble may yearn.  

These giants will come
knocking at your door,
I promise, but you will
be prepared for the war,

you will be prepared for
the bills.

What kind of king I would be
if I couldn’t declare war
upon myself?

It doesn’t mean that I mean never, but I will come back when it’s brighter, I promise. There’s no peace yet, no quiet. It’s hard for me to whisper more words like this, more beautiful than this.

I repeat it three time, for my own ears,

the horses, the horses, the horses.

She got up screaming, “Toby! Toby!”

She looked down at her summer dress, a strapless light blue mess. She was just sitting down for breakfast when she felt something strange oozing low from her tummy into her legs,

“Toby!” She screamed again, he was probably out in the garage building something. He’s always building something. She walked slowly, she felt disgusting and frightened at the same time.

She cracked open the front door to their house, she doesn’t care if the whole world will hear her, “TOBIAS HENRY MASON,” She screamed and then recoiled in pain. She could see the neighbors bringing in their groceries into their house, she waved weakly, and they back.

Toby poked his head out of the garage. His forehead was smeared in purple paint, “Hey gorgeous, what’s up?” He never seized to call her that. She thought, even if she was smeared with elephant shit from top to bottom he’d still make her feel beautiful.

But there was no time for that now, “Get your ass in here.”

Toby ditched the paint and ran up to her, “Bri, what’s wrong?” Then he looked down her dress and said, “Oh shit, oh shit,” and repeated it all the way into their bedroom. “What do we bring? I didn’t know this happened so quickly! Do you want to call your mom? Should I call my mom? What about your brother? Where the hell is my phone?!” Toby wasn’t that good under stress. She loved him for his flaws, but this was the worst time to freak out.

She placed his head between both of her hands, “Toby,” She said calmly, breathing heavily, “You’re going to put all of the bags in the living room in the back of the car. You’re going to hold on to my hand when you drive, you’re going to be okay, you’re going to be a great dad.”

He kissed her softly, “I can’t believe this is happening, I mean, I had 9 months to know it’s happening, but—“ Bri cut him off,

“Get in the car, unless you want me to deliver in this doorway.”